Thoughts from a sleepless night

God formed Man out of dirt from the ground and blew into his nostrils the breath of life. The Man came alive—a living soul!

God spoke: "Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature... God created human beings; he created them godlike, Reflecting God's nature.

I'm definetly not the first person to say it, but this thought has been stuck in my head all night (which tends to be a long time when you haven't slept). If those verses from the creation stories in Genesis contain an ultimate truth then living the way of Jesus isn't about fighting against or escaping our humanity; its about restoring our humanity, about becoming fully human.

I think thats awesome.

I swear I'm not gonna type this whole book...

I promise... maybe. But this totally resonated with where I am right now I had to share it.

...It was New York's Late Senator Daniel Moynihan who said, "Everyone is entitled to his or her own opinions, but no one is entitled to his or her own facts." Religion cannot hide from truth by seeking to accumulate its own facts. How, we need to as, can the heart be warmed if the mind is violated? Will the heart worship what the mind rejects? Hardly, unless the fear of nothingness creates hysteria that in turn replaces all rationality. The other side of this equation, however, is that the heart will not tolerate emptiness forever. It is, therefore, that human sense of emptiness that forces the mind to break new ground, to open new possibilities and to develop new alternatives. The spiritual reality we seek in this postmodern world cannot be achieved without enlightened minds, but it will also never be discovered without warm hearts. That is what drives us, I believe, to learn new ways in which to worship God with both heart and mind.¹ Before we can do that, however we must first be willing to allow our minds to destroy any formulation from the past that no longer works. There is something secure about the fantasy of unexamined truth, or a life that is so closed that it will not step beyond yesterday's human explanations, yet no God is well served who is not seriously questioned. We must face that fact openly and directly.

1. That is totally me right now till after this part. But I don't think I'm totally inline with the next sentence, but I also think the reason I'm not there is because of the truth in the next sentence. This should be quite the journey.

The Lament of a Believer in Exile

So I was at Barnes and Noble picking up a book I had on hold, when I came across the book "Jesus for the Non-Religious" by John Shelby Spong. Sounded interesting so I started reading the preface, and wasn't sure about it, then I came to the prologue, a poem by the author entitled The Lament of a Believer in Exile:

Ah, Jesus!
   Where have you gone?
       When did we lose you?
Was it when we became so certain that we possessed you
   That we persecuted Jews,
       Excommunicated doubters,
           Burned Heretics,
               And used violence and war to achieve conversion?
Was it when out first-century images
   Collided with expanding knowledge?
Or when biblical scholars informed us that the Bible does
   Not really support what we once believed?
Was it when we watched your followers distorting people
   With guilt,
       Fear,
           Bigotry,
               Intolerance,
                   And anger?
Was it when we noticed that many who called you Lord
   And who read their Bibles regularly
       Also practiced slavery,
           Defended segregation,
               Approved lynching,
                   Abused children,
                       Diminished women,
                           And hated homosexuals?
Was it when we finally realized
   That the Jesus who promised abundant life
       Could not be the source of self-hatred,
           Or one who encourages us to grovel
               In life-destroying penitence?
Was it when it dawned on us that serving you would require
   The surrender of those security-building prejudices
       That masquerade as our sweet sicknesses?

We still yearn for you, Jesus, but we no longer know where
   To seek your presence.
Do we look for you in those churches that practice certainty?
Or are you hiding in those churches
   That so fear controversy that they make "unity" a god,
       And stand for so little that they die of boredom?
Can you ever be found in those churches that have
   Rejected the powerless and the marginalized,
       The lepers and the Samaritans of our day,
           Those you called out brothers and sisters?
Or must we now look for you outside ecclesiastical setting,
   Where love and kindness expect no reward,
       Where question are viewed as the deepest
           Expressions of trust?

Is it even possible, Jesus, that we Christians are the villains
  Who killed you?
        Smothering you underneath literal Bibles,
               Dated creeds,
                   Irrelevant doctrines,
                       And dying structures?
If these things are the source of your disapearance, Jesus,
  Will you then reemerge if these things are removed?
       Will that bring resurrection?
Or were you, as some now suggest, never more
   Than an illusion?
By burying and distorting you were we
   Simply protecting ourselves
       From having to face that realization?

I still seek to possess what I believe you are, Jesus:
   Access to and embodiment of
       The source of Love,
           The ground of Being,
               A doorway into the mystery of holiness.

It is through that doorway I desire to walk.
   Will you meet me there?
       Will you challenge me,
           Guide me,
               Confront me,
                   Reveal your truth to me and in me?

Finally, at the end of this journey, Jesus,
   Will you embrace me
       Inside the ultimate reality
           That I call God
               In whom I live
                   And move
                       And having my being?
For that, Jesus, is my goal in this book.

Thoughts?

In true Duby fashion, I am writing a blog late at night, when I should be asleep, and have to wake up early, go figure.

Also true to my normal fashion, I have been mulling this post over in my head for the past few days, and then read something which pretty much totally said exactly what I was going to say, but a lot better and in a lot less words.

Our churches are filled with people who outwardly look contented and at peace but inwardly are crying out for someone to love them . . . just as they are - confused, frustrated, often frightened, guilty and often unable to communicate even within their own families. But the other people in the church look so happy and contented that one seldom has the courage to admit his own deep needs before such a self-sufficient group as the average church meeting appears to be ~ Keith Miller

I'm not sure where the quote originated from, but it is one of the opening quotes for a book called "Messy Spirituality" by Michael Yaconelli, and the book is amazing, you need to check it out.

Anyone who's ridden in my car before can attest to the fact that I'm a messy guy, and I'm going to admit right now that my spiritual life is the same. I'm seriously all over the place with questions and doubts (especially doubts) and I've decided I'm no longer going to put up a facade.

I have doubts about God and Christianity. I honestly have doubts about God's love, his involvement in the world, and at some times if God even truly exists. I'm sick of forced smiles and small talk, and I'm sick of the same old boxed answers, even the ones I've given a hundred times before.

So now its officially out there, I'm a mess, and it brings me hope.

"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." - Jesus, Matthew 18:3 (NIV)

Students help pay heating bills

Some local elementary students spent Saturday helping people stay warm.

Four classrooms from Sibley Elementary School in Grand Rapids wrote letters to local businesses asking them to sponsor the "Walk for Warmth" program.

The walk will help raise money for seniors and low income families who can't afford to pay their heating bills.

Students walked through the neighborhoods gathering pledges.

"So I can help people pay for their bills because not many can," said Trent Allen, "and I want to help everybody be able to pay for their bills and stay warm."

"Read for Rent" parents from the Martin Luther King, Jr. Leadership Academy joined in on Saturday's walk, as well as members of the Rental Property Owner's Association.

Generous

It was January of 2005, just weeks after the deadliest tsunami in recorded history devastated the South Asian Pacific.

As volunteer leaders of Sunday children’s activities, we knew that we would have 400 children who needed help understanding how to respond to the tsunami’s devastation. So we thought, Let’s teach the kids about being generous to those less fortunate than themselves.

In order to teach this generosity lesson, we made a plan to spend 100 days praying for and giving to tsunami victims.

That Sunday in the front of each room, we set up a donation box for blankets and a plastic tub for loose change. In the kindergarten and first grade room, a leader explained that next week the children could begin bringing donations.

Interrupting, a kindergarten-aged boy stood up from his seat, walked in front of all his peers and emptied his pockets into the tub. Without a word, he went back to his seat.

We were all astonished. This kindergartener’s response was so immediate. Why wait until next week to offer his loose change? He was wired with generosity–God-given generosity.

We discovered that there’s something instinctively generous in children. As leaders, we began wondering if there was something we needed to learn from them …

hmm...

White Privledge

It's been a while since I posted anything of any substance. Actually one could make the argument that nothing I've posted has really had much substance :) Anyway, I've been trying to avoid posting about the mundane going-ons of my current life, which has left pretty much nothing for me to post about. Until just a little while ago.

The following was written as a response to a post by a Xanga friend, Reverend Jeremy who rocks the internet handle APuritainMindset. It might help to read it. I'll post the quote he started off with which lead to my thoughts, for his thoughts on the whole thing (which might give a greater context to my words) you'll have to read his post.

Were five people killed in Salt Lake City this week because of Islamofascism? Don’t count on Big Media to answer that question. Here is what we know as of now. According to witnesses, an 18-year-old gunman calmly walked into a Utah shopping mall and started randomly killing customers. Thankfully, an off-duty police officer was able to slow him down, and the assailant was eventually killed in a shoot-out with Salt Lake City police. Early press reports only gave his age, but no name. ABC reported the story last night, but repeatedly said little was known about the shooter. Today, several Utah papers are reporting that the killer’s name was Sulejmen Talovic, and he was a Bosnian Muslim refugee.

Don’t expect to hear much more. Big Media has no interest in pursuing these sorts of cases. When a Muslim man intentionally mows people down in San Francisco with his SUV, the headline is: “SUV Driver Kills Pedestrians.” When a Muslim assailant bursts into a Jewish community center in Seattle and brutally murdered a Jewish woman and wounded five more, he is described as “sick,” and the story vanishes. When an Iranian college student tried to turn a rented SUV into a weapon of mass destruction, the media reported, “9 Injured by SUV at UNC-Chapel Hill.” We deserve to know whether Sulejmen Talovic was another example of “Sudden Jihad Syndrome,” but don’t hold your breath waiting for the facts.

- Gary Bauer

The quoted text from Mr.Bauer wreaks of white privilege. I wonder if Mr.Bauer would be asking the same questions if it had been a white conservative that had gone on a killing spree. Or how about asking the same questions every time a crime is committed by any white man. After all, Timothy McVeigh was white and how many people did he kill in his terror attack? Or how about Gale Nettles, another white man who believed he was working with Al Qaeda (ended up being undercover feds) to blow up a federal building in Chicago last year. Although I've found many people outside of chicago don't even know who Gale Nettles is. Or what about Eric Rudolph, who is best known for his bombing of the Olympic Games in Atlanta who also bombed abortion clinics and gay and lesbian night clubs. He also professes to be a christian. So why aren't we worrying about white christians being terrorists? Or how about the "trench coat mafia", why not assume and worry about any white teenage male being a terrorist?

Its because those whites and christians are us. We know that not all white people are terrorist because we're not a terrorist. But as soon as someone outside of our group does some hideous evil we start thinking that persons a terrorist. Hello white privilege. Especially in the case of Gale Nettles. That case quickly disappeared from the public eye, he was given a fair trail and got the sentence he deserved. If Gale Nettles had been anything but white, he'd be spending God knows how long at Gitmo Bay as an Enemy Combatant without any due process. The system seems to work, as long as you look like the majority.

A Few Resources

Eric Rudolph
Atlanta Olympic bombing suspect arrested - one of the literally hundreds of cnn stories about him
Eric and the Islamists - an interesting excerpt from the book "Hunting Eric Rudolph" comparing the similarities between the "Christian Identity" (the group Rudolph belonged to) and "Islamic Fundamentalist". Can't say I agree with everything, I'm educated on the "Christian Identity" movement enough to say one way or another. Just an interesting read.

Gale Nettles
Chicago man arrested in alleged bomb plot - cnn story
"Criminal" White Terrorist in Chicago Vs. Non-White "Enemy Combatants" - Music For Americans: music and other social causes short blurb

Tim Wise a speaker/author on White Privilege
http://timwise.org/ - I've been reading his book called White Like Me, and excellent read, pick up a copy like right now.

I'm assuming nothing is needed for Timothy McVeigh or the "Trench Coat Mafia"

Esteban!

I just saw Esteban and his incredibly beautiful daughter live at a very intimate venue, and had the cd and the illustration I did of him signed! And it was completely free! They got a good laugh when I told them I postponed my move back to michigan to go see them. During the hour long show they did some awesome improv of songs. Man that guy is amazing, and his daugther can play some awesome violin. So whats this intimate, free venue I speak of? Cassleberry Walmart, inbetween infants and grocery. It was awesome.